11.05.08
The Complaints.
Eh sorry la eh. I lame sikit kat toilet tadi. anyway, you da consider the previous suggestions? Ok, before I propose to you dengan suggestions2 yang lain, ape kata you tengok these complaints from people yang tak hire I jadi wedding planner dorang. Ehhh. I bukan nak burok kan siapa2, I cuma nak share je the problems yang dorang face kan. Jadi kita ni tak buat the same mistakes bile planning for your wedding nanti, ye? And don’t worry lah. I tak include nama mana2 bridal yang dorang pegi tu. *smiles*
COMPLAINT NO 1: “The cake. Who on earth got the cake for me? Yes, it was a three-tiered wedding cake. It was beautiful. But guess what, that’s just about it. I was advised against choosing chocolate cake and what not because it won’t hold for long. So I had fruit cake instead. And it wasn’t really nice. So yeah, we cut and distributed the cake at the end of the day, but we know like 3/4 of it got wasted. My $360 wasted just like that. And that’s considered cheap for a wedding cake, they said. $360 for a cake so that I can action2 cut the cake with my husband and pose for pictures? Might as well I photoshop the cake there. Seriously. With $360 I might as well get myself two gorgeous nightwears, or tens of beneficial books or something else yang lagi worth it. But I was tricked into spending it on the cake instead. Man, I’m still very sore about the cake.”
COMPLAINT NO 2: “I tak paham pasal hantaran ni. Yang wajibnya, adalah maharnya. MAHAR. Hantaran tu sebagai hadiah kan? I tanye you, mahar rate yang wajib kat Singapore sekarang berapa? ‘Market rate’ for hantaran pulak berapa? I don’t understand. If hantaran is ‘hadiah’ for the brides, then why must it be based on her education level, her social status and her family background? Say I have a group of friends whom I want to give gifts to. Do I buy the gifts according to their socio-economic status? No. I give them what I sincerely want to give. Nothing more, nothing less. And if hantaran is hadiah, then why are we putting a price tag on hantarans? Macam minta orang belikan hadiah yang berharga $50. Takleh kurang! Malu kan?
So tell me, why was everyone pressurising me to increase the hantaran I had to ask from my husband’s side? Why why why? I know it burdens him so. He’s trying to be independent, paying everything using his own money and not troubling his parents. But yet I had to make things difficult for him and ask for things which he is not able to provide for easily. Some people tried to convince me by saying if he loves me, then he’ll do all he can to meet the demand. But then it makes me feel like his love for me is worth whatever my hantaran is!
It’s just the whole cultural perception yang hantaran mesti mahal2. Kalau tak it’s something embarrassing. I tell you what’s embarrassing; when my husband terpaksa borrow from his own parents or anyone else just to pay that ridiculously high hantaran and everything else. I ask you, what is wrong if the hantaran is say, 3k? Does it reflect something very lowly about the couple and their family?
And I succumbed to the pressure of high hantaran. And guess what, it didn’t make ME happy at all. I felt sorry for my husband instead. And for myself, because it seems like I’ve forgotten the fact that I’m his wife and it doesn’t do me any good to know that he had to go through so much hardship and borrowed so much to pay for MY HANTARAN. I don’t know if any other wife would feel it’s something to be proud of and boast about, but I certainly don’t feel that way.”
COMPLAINT 3:“I don’t understand. I didn’t pay you to balas dendam of your watercolor-deprived childhood on my face. I didn’t pay to have people go “lainnye muke kaaaau” once they see me on my wedding day. No no, I didn’t pay to be disfigured on my wedding day. But you did just that, mak andam. You did just that.
You tampal bulu mata bedek on my eyelashes and boasted on the horrible eyeshadow or eye sockets or whatever that you did on my eyes. You said I looked soooo pretty. I thought I looked like Kumar. You slapped layers and layers of foundation on my face that I could not feel my own skin when I touched my face. Then you claimed I looked pale and so you were generous with the blusher on my cheeks. Ahh now you have rosy cheeks, you said. Well, honestly, I thought I looked like someone just slapped me real hard. And then to finish off your great masterpiece, you poured half a bottle of lip gloss on my lips that if I forget myself and laughed a little more than I should, I would have lip gloss on my teeth too.
I told you I thought it was too much. I said I wanted a natural-looking make-up. You told me this is considered ‘natural’, and you told me that it would look good in pictures. Being the naive me, I believed you. But really mdm mak andam, if that’s ‘natural’ to you, then your ‘heavy’ must be out of this world. And guess what mak andam, I didn’t look good in the pictures either. I looked different, yes, but not ‘good’. Although yeah, people told me I looked pretty (maybe they were just being nice). But really, I just thought I looked different. I know people say that you have to look different on your wedding day, but does being different necessarily equates being pretty? I know I am ugly but even I don’t deserve this mak andam.
And you even suggested and tried to convince me to pluck my bushy eyebrows. Luckily I didn’t buy it or I would regret it for the rest of my life.”
COMPLAINT NO 4: “The baju. You know how torturing it was? The super tight corset, the body-hugging baju which showed my corset-made sexy figure? I looked pretty yes, but it sure didn’t make my husband happy.
And my tudung. You said they were stylish, but they were either revealing my neck or showing the shape of my bosoms. God asked me to cover my ‘aurat, mak andam. Not just my hair.
You said I looked so gorgeous that day, but I felt sinful. You tried to pacify me by saying that it’s only ONE day in my life that I’m dressing up myself this way, but think about it mak andam; that was the ONE day in which I officially started my journey as a wife. And you helped me to taint it with sins I could’ve easily avoided if I wanted to. Thanks mak andam, thanks. I paid you for that ke ape.
You have to understand one thing, mak andam. I am not at all pretty, sexy, or sweet and alluring; and I myself know this only too well. But what I have is exclusivity. I am exclusive, mak andam. There’s only one person who has the ‘all access’ pass. And if he’s a good man, he’ll appreciate the exclusivity I’ve reserved just for him. So don’t bother trying to ‘beautify’ me. Even if you’ve done a good job, what matters is my ‘beauty’ in the long run. And my ‘beauty’ when I’m away from the public eye. Yes, mak andam. I’m referring to my exclusive ‘beauty’, and not the beauty which you publish ever so proudly as your ‘masterpiece’ in your mak andam packages.”
Haaa. You da baca complaints tu sume kan? You think about it dulu, ok? ;)
p/s: complaint2 di atas adalah rekaan semata2 (see people, i make disclaimers if they are not real! :p). tapi banyak kene mengenenye dengan yang sedang hidup dan bernafas sekarang ini.
p/p/s: doakan ye exams yang bakal mendatang. syukran semua:)
ruqayyah said,
November 5, 2008 at 3:46 pm
hehehe. k skrg kak ruqayyah boleh conpemkan yg hannah ni kelakar rupenye orgnya ye :p
hehe.
ummsofiyyah said,
November 5, 2008 at 3:49 pm
hehehe. is that a compliment? :p
Aisya-K said,
November 5, 2008 at 5:00 pm
wah pegi toilet mkn satu hari ehhhhh.. fuyo :P
ahh.. I like this one. The complaints are all best. hahaha. slain dr jadi wedding planner, hannah jadi mak andam skali ah. you jadi mak andam i k? pastu you blh pkaikn I inai mcm hari tu.. k k? pastu I tk paya baya u.. psl kte kn kwn… :P:P
ummsofiyyah said,
November 5, 2008 at 5:04 pm
ehh. kata da nak tdo? tipu hannah ehh. naughty eh:p
mak andam?? I jadi mak andam you? eh tanak la. i wedding planner:p nak suruh hannah draw kan inai? hahahah. tk professional jee. nnti sya nyesal.
haha. ye mmg kite kawan. mmuah! see u tmr, insyaAllah:)
redtide said,
November 5, 2008 at 10:58 pm
keep complaining.. =)
All the best, bi al-taufeeq wa al-najaah.. insya Allah..
ummsofiyyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 12:17 am
lol!
syukran. jazaakallah :)
ruqayyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 3:13 am
aii mestilah compliment.. :)
bit taufiq wan najah @—,–
ummsofiyyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 3:21 am
hehe. syukran many2 :)
wah dapat bunge sehh. sukenye. hehe. syukran again. jazaakillah:)
Bloghopper said,
November 6, 2008 at 8:12 am
nice one….best seh reading all the complaints! Ur blog is always fun and interesting to read…and all the best for the upcoming exam…
ummsofiyyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 8:41 am
helo bloghopper(:
Thank you very much! Fii amaanilLah(:
Ibn Majid said,
November 6, 2008 at 8:54 am
Wah Bezz..Harap semua bakal2 pangantin bace, sampai2 semua mak andam yang “normal” out there xde keje, cari profession lain yg better, jadi pelukis muka cartoon ke? keke.. Bittaufiq wannajah ukhti ;)
eusof said,
November 6, 2008 at 9:42 am
lol….
complaints complaints complaints…
3-Cs things i avoid in life…
C #1: Criticize
C #2: Compare
C #3: Complain.
Lol….
i love your posts though….;)
ummsofiyyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 1:19 pm
USTAZ Ibn Majid!
MasyaAllah. Ahlan wa sahlan wa marhaban bikum ;)
Mak andam2 jadi pelukis cartoon? Hm.. Seram pulak nak pikir how the characters would look like. hehe
Syukran ya akhi. Ilalliqa’, insyaAllah :)
ummsofiyyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 1:24 pm
Eusof, it’s NOT the wedding planner who complained, mind you.
thank you:)
Hairul said,
November 6, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Salams.
Hello hello.
Pandai eh complain2. Heh.
&& i’ve heard worst. Ada yang pinjam duit dr bakal isteri dia sendiri for the hantaran. YES, taking from her and giving back. Of course mak bpk si isteri tk tau psl tu…the high rate of hantaran might have been set by mak bpk si isteri.
And if my father ever saw pengantin make up lebih2, he would say: ”eh dia kawen ngn hantu lah!”
Ops sorry. No offence to anyone.
And u jadi wedding planner tk ajak i jadi business partner u ehk. Kecewa i. LOL. hehe.
All the best for your exams sis. Bit taufiq wal falah..(=
bint Isnin said,
November 6, 2008 at 3:51 pm
very funny tho but its true- agreed-….mcm pengalaman gitu heheh
ummsofiyyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Wsalam.
Hello :)
pinjam duit isteri sendiri for hantaran? pas tu kasi balek.. mmg common ah. ive heard of it too. tu sebab, sometimes it can be difficult. kdg pengantins are ok with low hantarans, tp maybe immediate family members are not. allahumma yassir wa laa tu’assir.
hahaha. hantu eh. tp kdg2 mmg cm tu. beyond recognition. scary.
alamak dik, i tak tau pun u berminat. minta maaf ler:p
syukran jaziilan bro. jazaakalLah:)
ummsofiyyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 4:03 pm
Salaam.
Wah wah. Kalau kita tadi ada Ibn Majid, skrg ada Bint Isnin pulak. hehe:p
takdelah pengalaman kak. ni sume client2 punye pengalaman. *snorttt*
:p
zaujah solihah aka Aisya-K said,
November 6, 2008 at 4:58 pm
amacam sya nye nick? ada bgs? HHAHAHA
client2 kapeeee hannah *same2 snort dgn hannah* ewww.
ummsofiyyah said,
November 6, 2008 at 6:06 pm
ZAUJAH SOLIHAH? ee perasannyeee:p haha. takdela. zaujah solihah? faaquulu aameen aameen:)
faruq said,
November 7, 2008 at 7:11 am
Whoa, the money from hantaran comes from the bride and goes back to her? That’s new. Sampai gitu skali…
I do know of parents who ask the groom to set the hantaran. Now that’s just perfect.
The hantaran, the pelamin, the deco, the cake, the photoshoot, the DJ, the mak andam, the honeymoon…
Money, money, money.
And what exactly am I supposed to say to God when He asks me why I haven’t done my Hajj – when He has given me the money to do so?
“Uh … I spent it all on my wedding … ?”
Prioritizing a sunnah (marriage) over a fard (Hajj)?
Once I’ve completed half my deen by having a wife, I intend to complete my 5 pillars by performing the Hajj, insyaAllah.
Then, I should be ready to meet Him.
ummsofiyyah said,
November 7, 2008 at 7:18 am
Faruq,
Yup yup. Just so that they the hantaran nanti bile disebut macam banyak gitu kan, and people would go “waah.”
Wah masyaAllah. Bakal in-laws yang suruh lelaki tetapkan hantaran? That’s like, every guy’s dream in-laws ah eh. Hehe
Nice. Semoga cepat dipertemukan jodohnya dan dipermudahkan pernikahannya. Ameen:)
abusyafiq said,
November 7, 2008 at 9:05 am
我真的有点不懂。。。
你那里有这么多时间来写这些东西。
ummsofiyyah said,
November 7, 2008 at 10:26 am
Kan bu dong jiu bu dong la. Ying wei ni lao le. Zhei ge shi gei wo men young people kan de.
Xie xie for your comment. Ni ye shi hen free yao comment wo de blog hor? :p
Bye. Wo xiang ni. Yi dian dian only :p
ummsofiyyah said,
November 7, 2008 at 10:29 am
Eh, bu shi bu shi. zhei ge ye shi gei ni kan de. So you understand. Wo get married le shi hou, wo yao zhen me yang the wedding :p
Bye. Don’t comment anymore ok? :p
abusyafiq said,
November 7, 2008 at 10:37 am
你说你爸爸老。。。
你坏蛋！
ummsofiyyah said,
November 7, 2008 at 10:46 am
It’s a fact what. Ni bu yao deny it, ke yi ma?
Ni jiao wo huai dan? Shi ni who is in denial. tsk tsk.
Hao la. Wo yao chu qu. byebye.
faruq said,
November 8, 2008 at 12:29 am
Amin thumma amin.
Jazakallah Khair.
May He grant you your life’s goals too.
meusof said,
November 8, 2008 at 3:33 am
wah hebat seh bahasa mandarin.
cen de li hai.
ummsofiyyah said,
November 8, 2008 at 4:23 am
faruq,
wa iyyak.
syukran.
ummsofiyyah said,
November 8, 2008 at 4:23 am
:)
Hairul said,
November 8, 2008 at 6:56 am
Eh bestnye bobal cine!
wo putong.wo pu che toa.wo mei yoa.wo pu yoa.
eh sori sy menyebok.
Ouh so its common that the groom pinjam dari bride and give it back to her. Ok..im learning new things everyday.
Thanks sis. Fii amaanilah. (=
ummsofiyyah said,
November 8, 2008 at 6:59 am
Hahahaha.
It’s common as in, da beberapa kali jugak la dengar. But I don’t know if that’s like an uderground trend or something. hehe.
You’re most welcome. Fi ri’aayatiH:)
jelot said,
November 9, 2008 at 12:07 pm
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA wo ming bai yi dian dian also.
wo shi huan (ni konfem pinyin salah) ni de entry.
by the way, i’m going to be my own mak andam (you’ve just lost a potential customer you know). woooo and that really means showing off moi (PLENTY) perabut! :P:P
ummsofiyyah said,
November 9, 2008 at 12:47 pm
Sibuk ajek kau:p
Pe jek. Kau lom dengar aku nye proposal for mak andam. Mesti kau bekenan punye jugak dengan idea aku. Hihi.
Nak tanak aku akan haunt kau sampai kau agree jadi client aku. In other words, you don’t really have a choice. Haha:p
zaujah solihah aidhon aka jelot said,
November 9, 2008 at 2:07 pm
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA “dengar” proposal kau?? hahahahahahah kau jangan nak lupa cita2 utk bersuara mcm _ _ _ _ _ _ ok HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA maklum jeeeeee……………… (paham-paham sendiri :P:P)
anw apesal aku tkle be my own mak andam seyy. are u trying to tell me that all these while aku mengandamkn diri tk lawa eh! ish.
p/s: aku nye nick tu, antazir qaul “ameen” minki HAHAHA
ummsofiyyah said,
November 9, 2008 at 2:34 pm
HAHAHAHA. Kurang asam:p Da eh. Kau stop it dengan ketawa kau yang bermaksud itu. Menggelikan aku tatkala aku teringat kembali conversation kite tadi. :p
Jelot, kau tengok sendiri result kau mengandamkan diri *points to your msn and facebook display pic*. Aku memanglah tak galakkan orang over melawa time nikah, tapi takde lah suruh jadi macam kau kan. Tsktsktsktsk.
You’re waiting? Ok aku akan ameen kan kata2 kau kalau aku berjaya hantar kau email dekat email address yang kau kasik when commenting ni. Haha! (kau and aku je tau ape email add tu:p ).